Paul’s Prescription for Purity

Introduction to Paul's Teaching

This evening we are looking at 1 Corinthians 7:1-9. Last week we examined the reality of sexual immorality and how it sins against our body by marrying a biological process—our sexuality—with sin. That's an abhorrent union. Sexual immorality is wrong, morally unacceptable, offensive to God, and a misuse of the body.

Now Paul answers the practical question: How do I use my body to glorify the Lord, especially in romantic relationships? Many shy away from Scripture's terminology on premarital romance—dating, courtship, engagement. Paul provides boundaries and guidelines so you're not left to your own devices. First Corinthians 7 offers one of the longest biblical presentations on premarital romance, with practical instructions for glorifying God with your body in relationships.

Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. I wish that all were as I am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

1 Corinthians 7:1-9 (ESV)

Our bodies have a purpose: to glorify God. The way to do that is to use them as intended, like following a car's owner's manual.

Purity Practiced Through Patience

Paul's prescription for purity starts with patience—be patient in physical intimacy. In verse 1, “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” The Greek word kalos means good, the opposite of kakos (evil). Not touching intimately is not just helpful; the opposite is wicked.

The word translated “sexual relations” or “touch” (haptō) means to touch intimately or passionately—like kindling a fire. Scripture doesn't explicitly forbid kissing or holding hands, but some actions kindle passion. In premarital romance, avoid testing boundaries; that's wicked because it risks igniting desires meant for marriage.

Don't pursue relationships without marital intent—they lead to heartache. If someone loves you biblically, they protect your purity, eternity, and spiritual well-being. Passionate touch that awakens love prematurely (as in Song of Solomon) sets you on fire. True love keeps it dormant until marriage.

You won't miss out on marital intimacy by waiting—God programmed sexuality to ignite in marriage. Premarital activity risks uniting sin with God-given desire, which you can't repent of, only redirect.

Purity Practiced Through Marriage

If self-control fails, marry: “Because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband” (v. 2). This applies to those betrothed or promised in marriage—the Bible recognizes only promised, engaged, or married as legitimate romantic relationships.

For those of marriageable age and ability, if passion burns, options are self-control or marriage. Society delays marriage, but Scripture doesn't. Grandparents married young and lasted decades. Don't heed worldly advice about missing your 20s—biblical fun differs.

Marriage doesn't cure sin; repentance does. But you can't repent of God-designed sexuality (heterosexual, for one's spouse). Sin distorts it, but untainted sexuality seeks marital expression. If awakened prematurely, marriage provides the proper context.

Paul concedes marriage (v. 6), wishing all were single and self-controlled like him (v. 7-8). Singleness isn't deficient—it's a gift. Ladies, delayed marriage isn't a flaw; it refines self-control, a greater gift to a future spouse. Contentment comes in purity, whether single or married.

Marital Intimacy: Giving, Not Demanding

In marriage: “The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does” (vv. 3-4).

Be a giver, not a demander—roles from Ephesians 5 persist in intimacy. Husbands protect and make wives feel loved; wives encourage husbands. Denying intimacy (v. 5) invites Satanic temptation due to lack of self-control. It's hypocritical to withhold when sin nature weakens.

Deprive only by mutual agreement for limited prayer-focused time, then reunite to avoid temptation.

Practical Application

If betrothed and burning, marry—better than burning (v. 9). Prolonging engagement heightens temptation. If not marriageable yet, practice self-control: flee temptation—run physically if needed. End relationships lacking purity respect.

Attraction feels good, but prioritize eternal glory over fleeting pleasure. Sexual sin risks eternal wrath; purity glorifies God now and forever. Get the best of both worlds: purity yielding eternal reward and marital joy.

Imitate Paul: single and self-controlled is valuable. Build romance on purity, not passion.