Dating Foundations, Part 2

Reviewing the Foundation: Glorify God in All Things

Last week we laid the most essential foundation for dating, which is also the foundation for everything in life: the glory of God. Whatever you do, do it unto the glory of God—whether eating a meal, drinking water, brushing your teeth, or playing video games. Your purpose as a created and redeemed being is to glorify God.

As Romans 3:23 explains:

for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.

Humanity's core problem is falling short of God's glory. Redeemed humanity now lives to glorify Him. Therefore, Christians must glorify God with their entire life, including dating.

This creates a logical conclusion: obedience to parents is essential in dating. If you're under their authority, rebelling against their wishes fails the purpose of dating—to glorify God. The Bible outlines three kinds of romantic relationships: promise to marriage, engagement to marriage, and marriage—all oriented toward marriage.

The Foundation of Purity: Understanding the Purpose of Your Body

Building on glorifying God, we now examine purity, especially the purpose of your body. In dating, the body risks becoming an instrument for self-gratification. Romantic interactions like kissing or handholding can lead to pleasure-seeking, so we must understand the biblical purpose of the body across all stages: promise to marriage, engagement, or marriage.

Without this foundation, attractions intensify, risking serious sin. Let's turn to 1 Corinthians 6:12–20 (ESV):

"All things are lawful for me," but not all things are helpful. "All things are lawful for me," but I will not be dominated by anything. Food is meant for the stomach and the stomach for food, and God will destroy both one and the other. The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. And God raised the Lord and will also raise us up by his power. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? Never! Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, "The two will become one flesh." But he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him. Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

Context: Anti-Relationship Vices

The context in chapters 5–6 addresses relationships, including romantic ones. The church tolerated an incestuous relationship—a sin worse than among unbelievers—due to misunderstanding the body's purpose.

1 Corinthians 5:9–11 and 6:9–11 list "anti-relationship vices" to avoid: sexually immoral, idolaters, adulterers, men who practice homosexuality, thieves, greedy, drunkards, revilers, swindlers. These destroy relationships. If someone claims to be a Christian yet exhibits these, purge them from the church—no Matthew 18 process needed. Unbelievers need the gospel.

These vices describe the former life of believers: "Such were some of you, but you were washed, you were sanctified." Now, pursue godly relationships leading to marriage, where men provide spiritually and women contribute their gifts, fulfilling Genesis: "It is not good that the man should be alone."

Biblical love is sacrificial giving for the other's betterment, as in John 3:16—not taking, as in eros love.

Principle: Not All Things Are Helpful or Profitable

Verse 12 applies broadly: "All things are lawful for me, but not all things are helpful... I will not be dominated by anything." Even non-sinful things can hinder sanctification or dominate you. Examine your life: Does this activity make you more like Christ? Sports, video games, friends, parties—bail if they don't profit spiritually.

In dating, refuse domination by physical attraction, infatuation, or the relationship itself. Be free to glorify God above all.

The Body's Divine Design: For the Lord, Not Immorality

Paul uses a "Captain Obvious" statement: "Food is meant for the stomach and the stomach for food." Then the punchline: "The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord." Your body was bought at the price of Christ's excruciating death—bearing God's wrath on the cross. Use it to glorify Him.

Motivations for Purity

Grotesque Imagery: "Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? Never!" Visualize detaching Christ's limbs for sin—may it sicken you.

Uniqueness of Sexual Sin: "Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body." Unlike gluttony or drugs, sexual immorality uniquely desecrates the temple of the Holy Spirit through spiritual union ("the two will become one flesh"). Flee it—it's the epitome of idolatry, called the "deep things of Satan" in Revelation.

Dangers Without Purity

Without purity:

• You risk domination by attraction or relationships, even in marriage.
• You risk unique sexual sin, the worst desecration.
• You fail dating's purpose: glorifying God, complicating your freedom to do so.

Be "husband-sexual" or "wife-sexual"—your type is your spouse.