Biblical Roles: Husband, Wife, and Singles

The Origin of Roles in Genesis

To understand roles, we must start at the beginning. The first role of humanity appears in Genesis 2:15-17.

Genesis 2:15-17
"The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and keep it. And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, 'You may surely eat of every tree of the garden, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.'"

Here, man receives three explicit roles: to work the garden, to protect it, and to obey God. Work was not a consequence of the fall; it was man's intended purpose. The curse made it laborious, but work, protection, and obedience within God's boundaries were always part of his role. Obedience means enjoying God's provision and blessing within His limits, as the trees were pleasing to the eyes and good for food (Genesis 2:9).

Implicitly, man must teach God's command to the woman, who did not hear it directly. He also represents humanity as federal headship, as seen in Romans 5, where his actions affect all mankind.

Summarizing man's role through Ephesians 5's lens on Genesis 2:24, he images Christ—saving, leading, and demonstrating the gospel in his relationship with his wife.

The Role of Woman as Helper

Before the fall, in a state of sinlessness, creation was declared "very good" except one thing: man's solitude. It was "not good" for man to be alone (Genesis 2). This incompleteness needed resolution.

God creates a helper suitable for him—a word meaning to complement, complete, and provide strength. She strengthens her man, not merely his tasks, enabling him to thrive. Without her, he is incomplete; without him, she has no direct object for her role.

Together, they cooperate equally in nature and salvation but differ in function, like the Trinity: equal essence, distinct roles. Man's headship reflects Christ; woman's submission reflects the church. This pre-fall structure preaches the gospel (Ephesians 5).

The Role of Singleness

If singleness was man's greatest pre-fall problem, is it always negative? No. Jesus affirms singleness in Matthew 19:10-12.

Matthew 19:10-12
"The disciples said to him, 'If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.' But he said to them, 'Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given. For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.'"

A "eunuch" here means one abstaining from marriage for kingdom focus. Singleness is not abnormal; it offers freedom to advance the gospel undivided. It is admirable and equal to marriage in glorifying God.

There is also temporary singleness, as in 1 Corinthians 7:6-8.

1 Corinthians 7:6-8
"I say this as a concession, not a command. I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am."

Paul praises singleness amid Corinth's fornication issues, emphasizing self-control. Even Paul, who could marry (1 Corinthians 9:5), chose singleness for gospel mission. Both permanent and temporary singleness focus on undivided devotion to Christ.

Roles in Romantic Relationships Before Marriage

Biblically, romantic relationships are promised betrothal, engaged betrothal, or marriage—all aiming for lifelong covenant. In 1 Corinthians 7:36, roles emphasize purity.

1 Corinthians 7:36
"If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin. But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well."

The man's role: self-control over passions, treating her as his virgin. The woman's role: purity as his virgin. This builds a firm foundation, avoiding fornication-based marriages. Purity honors God, securing undivided devotion to the Lord (1 Corinthians 7:32-35).

Redemption applies: even post-sin, one can be presented as a pure virgin to Christ (2 Corinthians 11:2). Past failure does not disqualify; gospel redemption restores purity.

Commitments are serious, as in Matthew 1:18-19, where Joseph considers "divorcing" betrothed Mary quietly for apparent fornication—treating engagement with marriage-like gravity.

Encouraging Others in Their Roles

Understanding roles equips us to help others in covenant community. Experience is secondary to Scripture. Confront wandering with truth (James 5:19), men to men, women to women. Whether single, dating, or married, focus on holiness, trusting God for roles, and demonstrating the gospel.