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From CCEF: What Has Been Most Helpful in Your Marriage?

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Confession of sin before the Lord is a powerful tool that can bring significant change and growth in marriage. This is the conclusion set forth by Aubrynn Whitted in her article, “What Has Been Most Helpful in Your Marriage?” published on the Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation website. According to Whitted, the apostle John's teaching about proper fellowship with both God and fellow man in 1 John 1:6-9 highlights the power and importance of ordinary confession for a successful relationship.

Confession of sin is an intentional act of admitting our wrongdoing, forgiving one another, and seeking renewal from God. This practice, when taken daily, holds the potential to disrupt the damaging cycle of defense and accusation that so often arises in a couple's relationship. By taking a few minutes each day to confess our own sins, we become more equipped to listen to our spouse's concerns and replace anger and judgment with understanding and patience.

Whitted goes on to note that the practice of confession can be difficult, particularly when it feels like one partner is being held to a higher standard than the other. It is, therefore, important to make sure that confession is held within the context of a relationship of mutual love and respect.

In conclusion, confession of sin before the Lord is a powerful and necessary tool in any marriage. It encourages us to take responsibility for our own harmful behaviors, promotes understanding and respect between partners, and ultimately strengthens our relationship with God. As Whitted puts it, “If you could give one thing to a marriage that would bring the most dramatic change and growth, what would it be? ... Confess your own sins before God every day, and watch what happens.”

Here is a brief excerpt from her article:

I opened an all-day marriage seminar with this topic: confession of sin before the Lord. It came about because I decided to lead with the question, “What has been most helpful in my own marriage?” I would have preferred to answer “a soulful, extended hug,” or “laughter”—which was the prescription from a popular marriage seminar we attended years ago. Either would have been a nice way to ease into the day, but for me, the answer was, and is, confession. Confession—ordinary Lord’s-Prayer-confession, “forgive us our debts”—has been most helpful. This is as it should be.

Our relationship with the Lord is the foundation for our relations...

You can read her full article here